O Christmas Tree

"O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree, How I love thee . . . "

Sadly, our house does not have a Christmas Tree. And there is no "yet" following that sentence.

I have to say that I am a bit down about this. (Anyone want to invite me over to oogle at their tree for a few hours?)

I would have loved to have had a tree up the day after Thanksgiving, or at least by 1 December, but that didn't happen. I was okay with that though, because we had family come in for Thanksgiving and it was a busy week. And we don't have an artificial tree, so we would have to go get a real tree.

Then I had the "brilliant" idea of getting a live tree from the Cibola National Forest that's practically next door to Albuquerque. I looked up the website to the National Forest Service and it turns out that you could apply for a permit for $10 and then a get a tree, up to 10 feet tall, for an additional $10. Sweet! I was all about that!

Then in the week that followed, I got to thinking about that. Taking a 2 year old, a 20 month old and a 4 month old, into the national forest, in the snow, where there are mountain lions. (I have a real fear of mountain lion attacks - probably over-rated, but anyway, I'm a fierce mama sometimes.) Yeah . . . maybe that wasn't the best idea . . . So that was one weekend out. And Mike didn't want to look for a real tree anywhere else that weekend.

So plan B. We'll just get a real tree from a local place. I even spotted a place selling real trees (from New Mexico) in town. The plans were to get that tree last Saturday.

Well, the Space Division Holiday Party happened last Friday night (more on that later), and we ended up sleeping in that morning. I was hoping we could squeeze in getting a tree and at least getting it into the stand before I had to get ready for my Christmas Tea (more on that later too), but that didn't happen. Another weekend out.

Now we're down to twelve days left until Christmas and there isn't so much as a pine tree whiff around my house. No Christmas lights. And Mike is talking of not getting a tree at all. Money and all that. Yes, finances are tight, but that tight? Apparently so to him.

There's been some talk of getting a fake tree, but when I realized how expensive they are, that went out the window. And Mike and I do like getting a real tree. There's something about having a real tree . . .

I guess the biggest reason I'm upset about this is because we didn't have a tree last year. I was all about not having a tree last year because Edward was at that stage where he was crawling and pulling up and putting everything, and I mean everything (including my Dad's hearing aid), in his mouth. I so did not want to have him put an ornament hook or something like that in his mouth, or pull the tree onto himself. So we settled for my tiny 12 inch Christmas tree from when I was a little girl.

Christmas tree 2010

Christmas tree 2010

However, not having a tree last year made me really, really look forward to having a tree this year.

And looking back over the Christmases of my life, they haven't always exactly been merry. I so want to end that tradition.

There was the first Christmas after my parents were separated and all my brother and I wanted for Christmas was for our parents to get back together. You talk about the quietest Christmas with kids you ever saw . . .

Then there was the Christmas we couldn't afford a tree.

Then there were all the Christmases with my ex where he totally left me out of the tree buying and decorating process, something I absolutely love. There's nothing like being all excited to decorate the tree with your spouse, and you come home from work one day and it's all decorated and there is nothing left for you to do. And then knowing how you feel, continues to do that the following two years. 

Then there were the Christmases I had as a single woman, except for the last one, where I couldn't afford a tree and didn't have a single Christmas decoration. That last Christmas, a wonderful friend found out about that and gave me their old Christmas tree, and decorations too. And that Christmas I got to decorate with some of my amazing friends from Bible study in Oklahoma. That was a great Christmas! :)

Macy, myself, Natalie, Caylee, Kyle and Asher at my apartment in 2006 decorating the tree for Christmas.

The finished tree. :)

The first three Christmases Mike and I were married we had a great time decorating the tree together and it was wonderful. I really cherish that time together and those memories.

Decorating the tree in 2007, first Christmas with Mike.

Mike decorating the tree.

The finished tree. :)

Missy under the tree our second Christmas together, 2008.

The finished tree. (Notice the blinds in the background - that's what happens when you have a cat that is neither stealthy nor graceful.)

Two Christmases ago we went to a Christmas Tree farm in Oklahoma and cut down our own tree and we had such a great time doing that. I was six months pregnant with Edward and Sophie was nine months old (almost). That tree was the absolutely most perfect tree I have ever seen (or had) for Christmas.

Mike next to our Christmas tree in Oklahoma, 2009.

Sophie and I next to our Christmas Tree in Oklahoma. Sophie was 8 months old, I was 6 months pregnant. 2009.

The tree is up, but not decorated.

The decorated tree, 2009.

Sophie was so excited for Christmas! :D 2009, 9 months old

The stockings were hung with care . . . 2009

It's not that a tree is what makes Christmas, it isn't. I know that.

It's the special memories that you build with your family. It's about creating family traditions that your kids will look back on with fondness and love. The memories I have from early childhood Christmases are near and dear to my heart. And it wasn't the present opening (honestly, I hardly remember those parts). It was going out and finding a tree together and then bringing it home and decorating while listening to Christmas music and drinking eggnog (Shenandoah Pride still has the best eggnog I've ever tasted!).

It's about setting up the Nativity Scene with care and reflecting back on the miracle of Christ, the Lord, coming to earth in the form of a new born baby. The humility of his arrival in a stable, where He was first greeted by shepherds.

It's about lighting candles (and Christmas lights) to remind us that we are lights for Christ in a dark world.

It's about making cookies and special treats with your kids that bring Christmas to completion in all the senses.

It's about singing carols about Christ being born and worshiping our Savior through song.

It's a time to get together with extended family that you may not see very often (especially if you are in the military) and having a special meal together. Or, in cases in the military, it's about bringing over those cherished friends who become your family away from family and sharing that special meal with them.

All of that to me, in a way, is wrapped up in a Christmas Tree. It's like the tree is symbolic for all of that.

And the evergreen tree is symbolic of Christ's ever-present love for us. A tangible reminder that Christ is always with us, always loves us, always forgives us.

So here's to having a Christmas tree next year. :)